Out at the back of the hotel there was a lake which was very peacefull to sit in the morning......until the irritating kids who were camping to go fishing were up and awake screaming like the gits they were.

I was sitting, reading, having an early morning smoke in the sunshine, listening to the birdsong when the little shits get out of their tent on the far-side of the lake and a booming voice immediatly comes over the tannoy:

"YOU ARE ON PRIVATE LAND. LEAVE THE SITE IMMEDIATLY! YOU ARE BEING MONITORED BY AUTOMATED SECURITY SYSTEMS! LEAVE IMMEDIATLY!"

I swear to God I was waiting for "YOU HAVE 20 SECONDS TO COMPLY!", and the sudden appearance of the ED-209.

Which wouldn'y have been too bad a thing as the little shits would have been gone at least.
click on pic for bigness